Any Damages fans out there? Whenever things get slow on the TV front, my husband and I go to Netflix or OnDemand and test out shows we missed or didn't get hooked on initially. We first tried Damages six months ago. My poor hubby watched the first episode twice because I fell asleep both times! So we gave up and have just come back around. We've watched nine episodes this week, we can be obsessive like that, and I've only fallen asleep once (score!).
Anyway, there's a lot happening in the series and Glenn Close is absolutely a force to be reckoned with! But one of the themes that really caught our attention was the main character's struggles in picking work vs. family. She's a young, bright, and eager attorney hired by Glenn Close's character Patty Hewes. Patty puts Ellen through an array of tests and consequently, Ellen misses her own engagement party, tells her future husband to pick out the wedding cake since she doesn't have time, and essentially ignores her parents as they go through some things.
My husband said it reminded him of me. I was initially appalled since I planned our whole wedding single-handedly (while working) and worked from home for most of Myki's first year of life. I may not have ever felt balanced in it all, but I was doing my darnedest! But we talked more and I thought about it, and I think he means a lack of mental presence versus the physical. I'm always everywhere I need to be for my family, but I'm also on my Blackberry ensuring nothing slips through at work and my iPhone responding to emails from friends or one of many personal commitments I've made whether it was getting an MBA in Mykis first two years of life or serving on the National Leadership Team for my sorority.
He argues that its never felt like I've gotten as much from my employers as I put in...until now. Now I work in a role where I can shine. I'm given license to do a lot and the opportunity to constantly network and reach out to people I can learn from. But it's true, for many years in the non-profit world, I was under appreciated, and there was never really room for growth in any of those positions. And with good reason I think, my husband notes that there were times that giving that 150% on my end, being accommodating to customers and colleagues, was not in the best interest of the men who needed me to focus some additional mental energy on them, my husband and son.
In my defense, I can't decrease my professional integrity or commitment to excellence based on other people; I can't let a bad employer bring me to their level. And ultimately, it's my name attached to the work; good or bad, it is a reflection of me. So I always worked, and still work, like its a six figure job, like I am the woman in charge. And that way, when the six figure job (or blog!) comes along, I'll be ready! There will be no surprises because I'll have spent my entire career pushing myself to work at the highest level I can.
Balance is something I work on everyday; its just as critical to my success as excellence and work ethic. I think Ellen lost her professional integrity and sense of balance and she absolutely sacrificed her priorities to have a "dream" job. But, there are four and a half more seasons to watch, so I have hope she'll find her way, and I know I'm well on mine!
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