On to Trump

When Barack Obama was elected in 2008, Cory Booker caught himself on MSNBC saying how glorious it all was.  Specifically, he said he was "basking in the racial deliciousness" of our first black president.  My husband and I had a good laugh about that.  As ridiculous as the words were, I could relate to the giddiness of this new reality.  A seemingly impossible door was opened for people who look like me, for my future sons who could now reasonably aspire to the presidency.  It was possible.

This week I felt similarly verklempt.  I watched President Obama award Vice President Biden the Presidential Medal of Freedom with Distinction, listened to the words these brothers shared and was overcome with the reality that people like me were responsible for this country and now people against me would steer the fate of our county for at least the next four years and probably eight as history shows.  

When I say like me, I don't mean just that Obama was black.  I mean people who can clearly build meaningful human connection, people who are self-made and at least aware of the privilege they hold, people who communicate with such decency and maturity and men who love, honor and respect their wives.  After next Friday, this simply won't be true.

I don't know how to feel about what happens next.  I am afraid of what I don't know and what I don't have. With the sheer volume of information available to me, I feel completely overwhelmed about political goings on.  Every other story outlines a grim and hopeless image - all politicians are in someone's pocket, party lines are too rigid to get anything done and catastrophic decisions are on the horizon. It is in discomfort that we grow and so I debate with myself daily on how I should proceed.

Do I lean in to the information and educate myself about what is happening regardless of how depressing it might feel?  Do I ignore it all in favor of my work, my home, my husband and my boys?  Friends and family and the dozens of daily responsibilities in all of our lives can easily overshadow the work and energy required to be informed.

If it were my boys asking, I would say that although our symbol of hope is moving on, hope is not lost.  I would tell them that they are brilliant and capable and can make a difference in the likely difficult times ahead.  And that while there is a segment of this country that feels we hurt their odds of success and would have legislation passed that endanger our bodies and our rights in numerous ways, there are more allies than our oppononents would have us believe.

Hopefully I can heed my own advice.

Resolutions and Musings, 2017

I really love the start of a new year.  Like most people, it's an opportunity to examine where I am in life and make a plan for how I will improve this next glorious year.  While I have been floundering in the "doing it all" arena for the past few years, I am an overachiever at heart and my New Years resolution quickly goes from one good intention to a robust list of to do's and projects.  Intellectually, I know that setting a few very important goals will get me further than a revolutionary 20 point plan. And you know, when you know better, you should do better so this year, I'm limiting my new year's resolutions to a top 3:

1. Write More - I am a really fantastic writer but like any muscle, my writing skills have atrophied due to non-use (professional communication aside).  Every time I sit down to write, I think, I've got nothing to say.  Who wants to read more about a working mother's search for balance (spoiler alert: it's still a struggle).  But I love to write and I'm proud of this ability.  This year, I want to write about (and to) my boys, about being woke, about professional pursuits and funny stories and the ah-ha moments that come to me during a long hot shower.  I will be better for it and I think those who read what I write will to.

2. Love More - I love my husband, my boys, my parents, my siblings and my besties with every fiber of my being.  I love them all desperately and fiercely.  But I know they don't always feel that love. In my quest to be worthy of them, to make them all proud, I work a lot and when I'm not working, I'm thinking about work or recovering from overworking.  This year i will try to snuggle more, go on adventures together, pick up the phone, make plans and intentionally cultivate those relationships so they know how much they truly mean to me.

3. Move More - As I get older (and heavier), I am absolutely struggling through an energy crisis.  I am just in this constant state of exhaustion and the consequence is that at every opportunity, I sit my behind down on the sofa or in the bed or in a rocker.  I nurse my baby, binge watch my shows and scroll through social media instead of moving around.  I will get up to clean and organize this house I worked so hard for. I will take my boys out on walks and to see new people and places. I will dance when I wake up and before I go to bed.  I hope this is an "if you build it, they will come" scenario.  If I fake it 'til I make it and move instead of sit, perhaps the energy will emerge.

2016 was an incredible year for me.  I completed a full year as a homeowner, welcomed a 2nd beautiful, perfect boy to my clan, learned how special my work is as my boss, colleagues and clients showered me with good vibes and gave me the space I needed in my transition to Mami of two and made some incredible memories.  Hopefully, with these intentions in mind,

2017 will be even more phenomenal.