Nature vs. Nurture

One of the most amazing things about parenthood is seeing your own characteristics and that of your child's father (usually good!) in your child(ren). My extended family recently suffered a tragic death, a life ended entirely too soon. He is survived by many loved ones including his wife and toddler son. It is unlikely the baby will remember his father, but more than likely, he will share characteristics with him more than just his appearance.

It's amazing how similar our children can end up being to us, even if we're not around. It begs the question, which is stronger: nature or nurture? There is strong research that proves both nature and nurture can play a significant role in the final product. Research is tricky though because researchers always seem to be able to create the experiment and circumstance that will prove their thesis. Hence all of the conflicting research I think.  I digress...

There are some wonderful things about me that Myki absolutely has.  And some other things that I wouldn't go so far as to say I would change, but that make my role as Mother challenging and might add some turbulence to Myki's life.  He is determined - a desirable trait when you consider all of the adversity he may face as a brown boy and all of the hopes his parents have for his future - also a challenge when manifested into obstinate stubbornness.  Myki is also really sharp - he understands things so quickly.  While I like to think he got that from me, I'm also convinced he's already got me figured out and hustles me on a regular basis.  Like me, Myki has an outward confidence that can border on arrogance, but he is ludicrously sensitive...God help me if I yell at him; there will be tears.

                                             Did the characteristic transference begin then?


There are also things he gets from his father.  They are silly, so silly, but shy - only in their comfort zone will you see the extent of the sillies.  They're performers at the heart of it all; really love discussion and are super affectionate.

What do you think is most prevalent in determining childrens' characteristics; nature or nurture?
Is there anything your child does that absolutely comes from you?